My Birthday Thought Process

So, my birthday's coming up. Like, SOON. And I'm not one of those people who gets all dressed up & expects everyone to fall at their feet on their birthday, but I tend to get excited about my birthday, making it sound like a big/commercial/national holiday that people need to prepare for. Haha. Obviously, I'm totally kidding. In fact, I'm NOT a fan of birthday parties. Or presents. Or any of the cliche birthday woop-de-doos. I just like to think back on the year like, "What have I done since I turned [whatever age I currently am]? What will I do after I turn [however old I'm about to turn]?" But this year has produced a new, funnier thought process. This is pretty much it:

"Today is January 5th. January. I like January. My birthday's in January. OH HEY! My birthday's in January. That's like SOON. Only {start a mental count of the days left} 21 days until I turn 19!! 19. Wow. Can't believe I'm going to be that old. Ha. Mom got married when she was 19... Ha. That is NOT happening this year. Because first, you have to go on dates. Then you have to date someone repeatedly. Then you have to have a boyfriend. Then he has to propose to you. THEN you get married. And I haven't been on a date in several months. And I planned the last one. Bummer, yo. But the last one was fun...it was with [name with-held! Haha]. He's a cool guy. I'm glad I got to know him in Beauty & the Beast. Ah, Beauty & the Beast...that was a fun show. Let's see. Today is the 5th...HEY! We had our 4th rehearsal this day, a year ago! That was fun. I remember we started doing fittings for costumes, we saw a paper display of the set, & started talking about the special effects of the ending. Haha! And [ANOTHER NAME that's been with-held] asked me on a date in his best impression of a British accent! THAT was a fun date! Wow. That was a year ago... That was even before I turned 18. Ah, my 18th birthday. Dad brought a cake to rehearsal. My friends attempted to throw me a surprise party...[think of all the people that came to that] Wow, my friends-group has changed a lot since then. I should throw a party this year. HEY! My birthday's coming up! And it's on a Saturday!!! I can finally have a party ON my birthday!!! Oh wait. I'll be in Florida. All alone. I have 12 days to make friends so I don't feel completely alone...maybe someone will skype me? Or call me? That would be nice....my 19th birthday. I'm getting old. I could get married this year..." [and the thing continues]